Tuesday, April 16, 2013

finding a friend

So, finding friends is hard as a mom. When you are in school, friends are easy to find, but when you become a mom, , those "friends" you thought you had seem to disappear.  It is damn near impossible to be friends with someone who isn't a mom. Try as we might, it is also hard to be friends with moms who have totally different beliefs when it comes to raising children. I will take people as they are, until I feel judged...nobody likes to feel judged, but being judged as a mother,  that is the worst. feeling judged as a mom is like judging my job performance and me as a person times 10+...I am a mom first, it is who I am, it effects all my choices and decisions.  Now, I know there are hundreds of magazines and websites about not letting being a mom define you as a person...not letting it be all you are. Question, why is it a doctor can put a big "Dr." In front of their name and wear it as a badge, it is who they are,  even walking through the grocrry aisles...but a mom being a mom is degrading to women?
Back to what I was saying, nobody wants to be judged, but I will admit I do judge from time to time.
I have a hard time keeping friends once I open my mouth it seems. I don't really understand how "natural" parents can use government assistance as their life line. (Or any parent for that matter) now, dont get me wrong, I have used food stamps for a short time, and I have had badgercare for my kids-but it was temporary and we did what we could to get off it. I hated being on assistance, I felt like I shouldn't have had kids if I couldn't afford to care for them...but shit happens! We were well off, and then we weren't.  I worked less than pretty jobs, as did Nathan, but we did it to get off assistance and to keep a roof over the kids heads and food in their bellies.
 I am happy we live in a country where we can help those who need it, we can save innocent lives and I am proud of that...but so many able bodied people sit on their backsides instead of working for their family. I really think dads should be held more accountable for their kids, as should the moms who get pregnant when not married. I know Shit happens, but I do not feel they should be able to live off the system forever. I don't understand why we are not pushing more moms to breastfeed. If we helped single moms establish breastfeeding instead of giving them free formula,  the country would be better for it. I also think if someone wants birth control ( though I do not believe in medication as my body doesn't like it...) like a vasectomy,  or tubes tied...they should be able to get it. Yes, it is expensive, but it is cheaper than raising unplanned kids for them.
Back to food and regulations, why aren't we pushing schools to have gardens, not only could it save money, but I think the kids could learn where food comes from and be healthier. Community gardens woulx be next! Instead of handing out plastic cards loaded with huge amounts of money on them...used to purchase JUNK... have a community garden. If you want food, you help with the garden!  If fresh fruits and veggies and wild gsme meats are good enough for my organic df/gf family, I think they should be good enough for families that cannot afford food. Hunters could donate wild game, farmers could donate old hens or extra eggs...tax write off. We could save so much money!   we would only be offering healthy food...what is wrong with that?  My bet would be many retired people would donate some labor or knowledge, could can fresh fruits and veggies and freeze them as well. I know none of this is cheap, but in the long run it would be! Health savings, food savings....hell, it could be an excellent opportunity to teach kids and moms more! If we must cut corners, only allow so many canned jars per family, or have them pay a deposit of $1/jar...enough to replace jars if lost or broken, saves on recycling and trash and just waste in general. We seriously need to go back to working together,  yea big corporate is convenient,  but why pay wal-mart when you could help your neighbor? We need more of a homestead type community!  We can still be technologically advanced and down to earth!  For the health of our nation, our people...it just makes sense!
Now, im all off track and over the board again...but I feel it is important to show what I mean...I lose friends because of my opinion...n my opinion is this: we need to work together to save our people, to save us money, to have healthy familes free of government assistance...am I wrong?

No comments:

Post a Comment